Preface

the one with the Nie (fucking Nie Huaisang)
Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/41268627.

Rating:
Teen And Up Audiences
Archive Warning:
No Archive Warnings Apply
Category:
F/F, M/M
Fandom:
陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
Relationship:
Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī/Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn, Luó "Mián Mián" Qīngyáng/Wēn Qíng
Character:
Luó "Mián Mián" Qīngyáng, Niè Huáisāng, Lán Zhàn | Lán Wàngjī, Wèi Yīng | Wèi Wúxiàn, Wēn Qíng (Módào Zǔshī), Niè Míngjué
Additional Tags:
Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Burial Mounds Ensemble as Family (Módào Zǔshī), Burial Mounds Settlement Days (Módào Zǔshī), Families of Choice, Scheming Niè Huáisāng, domestic disaster Wei Wuxian, Mian Mian says fuck a lot, Humor, Nie Mingjue is Le Tired, no AI
Language:
English
Series:
Part 6 of big sister Mian Mian
Stats:
Published: 2022-08-25 Words: 3,332 Chapters: 1/1

the one with the Nie (fucking Nie Huaisang)

Summary

Nie Huaisang had plans.

Luo Qingyang would appreciate if his plans didn’t involve that much sneaky plotting. But hey, if they worked, she wasn’t going to complain because she wasn’t fucking stupid.

the one with the Nie (fucking Nie Huaisang)

When Luo Qingyang stumbled into the kitchen, bleary-eyed and clad only in her underrobes, the last thing she expected to see was someone who definitely wasn’t supposed to be there. So, naturally, she felt like she could be blamed for neither the unholy screech that left her mouth nor the way she grabbed a cooking knife from the side table and brandished it at Nie Huaisang.

”What the FUCK are you doing here?” She yelled, bewildered. ”How the hell did you even get in through the wards?”

Nie Huaisang sat at the table, prim and proper, fluttering a fan nervously in front of his face. ”The…wards?” He asked, opening his eyes wide. ”There were wards? I really don’t know, I just—did you know there isn’t a proper wine house in Yiling? I tried to find one but the selection is truly abysmal and I merely kept wandering and then suddenly—I was here!” He cocked his head like a curious dog. ”Isn’t that marvelous?”

”How. The fuck. Did you. Get. In.” Luo Qingyang repeated through clenched teeth. She was feeling increasingly stupid, standing there in her disheveled robes and holding a cooking knife at the little brother of one of the most volatile and scary sect leaders of her time (you know, of the ones who were still alive, that was).

”Are you sure you should be waving that around?” Nie Huaisang asked with a faint frown, snapped his fan shut, and carefully pushed the knife to the side with the side of his fan. (The sides looked like they were made of steel and stamped with protective spells. What the fuck?)

Resigned, Luo Qingyang dropped the knife that embedded itself on the table with a thunk. ”I’m not nearly awake enough for this conversation,” she muttered and turned to make tea. She kept an eye on their early visitor from the corner of her eye, though. She wasn’t fucking stupid.

”But you don’t even know what the conversation is about,” Nie Huaisang murmured.

She snorted. ”Does it matter?”

Nie Huaisang let out a considering hum, snapped his fan open, and lazily fanned himself as he looked curiously around. ”You’ve built quite a home for yourselves,” he said idly.

”Mn.”

That prompted a small chuckle. ”You’ve definitely spent time with Lan Wangji. You sound just like him!”

Luo Qingyang took it as a compliment.

 


 

”Wait, wait, wait, hold on,” Wei Wuxian said, holding his hand up like he was about to give a speech. The impact was slightly dampened by the fact that he, too, was in his haphazardly tied underrobes that showed a lot more skin and love bites than anyone else than Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji were comfortable with. ”What do you mean, ’an alliance?’ ”

Nie Huaisang frowned faintly from behind his fan. ”What do you mean, ’what do I mean?’ I said what I said.”

”You are such an odd little man,” Luo Qingyang said. 

Nie Huaisang’s eyes got, if possible, even bigger. ”Me?”

Wei Wuxian let out a decidedly unattractive snort but somehow, Lan Wangji still looked besotted. Urgh. Young love, Luo Qingyang sighed. So annoying.

”I have to say I’m unsure of what kind of an alliance you’re proposing, Young Master Nie,” A-Qing said, tone carefully polite. ”Both myself and Wei Wuxian are already paired off and the only one with any kinds of marital prospects is A-Yuan—and he’s way too young for any kinds of negotiations.”

”Aiyah, don’t write Granny off just yet,” Luo Qingyang said with a completely straight face. ”She might be our hidden prize!”

”She has a thing with Uncle Four,” A-Qing deadpanned.

”Granny—Uncle—what?” Wei Wuxian said, his tone growing into a shrilly squeal in the end.

”You’re cute when you’re confused,” Luo Qingyang said sarcastically. 

”True,” Lan Wangji agreed solemnly but since it was Lan Wangji, he couldn’t be trusted. He probably meant it.

”As entertaining as all of…this…is,” Nie Huaisang said, wiggling his fingers vaguely, ”I was actually serious. You need an alliance.”

A-Qing tilted her head and narrowed her eyes. ”So. If not marriage, what then? Adoption is out of the question because the only living Wen child has already been adopted—” (”No, really, what?” ”Hush, Wei Ying.”) ”—and while the idea of an army of fierce corpses guarding the gates of the Unclean Realm is somewhat amusing, I don’t think your brother would be thrilled about it.”

Nie Huaisang blinked a couple of times, eyes going strangely vacant. Luo Qingyang seriously hoped he wasn’t dreaming about an army of undead guarding the gates of the Unclean Realm because fuck no. ”Ah, no, I have other plans for da-ge,” he said airily. ”I was thinking about sworn brotherhood.”

”With whom?” A-Qing asked.

”With me, of course!” Nie Huaisang said cheerily. ”I mean, Wei-xiong and me.”

”You know what, that might actually work,” Luo Qingyang said. ”But why not extend it? Why not include Lan Wangji and Jiang Wanyin as well? And while we’re at it, throw Jin Zixuan in for a good measure.”

”Oh, I can throw Jin Zixuan alright,” Wei Wuxian muttered darkly under his breath and was then placated to slight pouting by Lan Wangji pressing his lips on Wei Wuxian’s temple and putting his hand somewhere Luo Qingyang absolutely didn’t want to look too closely. 

”Well, you see,” Nie Huaisang said, fluttering his fan. ”Lan Wangji is already connected to Wei Wuxian because they’re practically married. Of course, we should rectify that as soon as possible because informal ties are informal ties, and official marriage between Yiling Wei and Gusu Lan would stabilize the former and give a clear statement of the latter’s loyalties. Young Master Jin is also irrelevant because he’s married to Jiang Yanli—Wei Wuxian’s adoptive sister—and they’re currently at Lotus Pier. Their standing in all this is very clear.” He paused. ”Or that’s what I assume, at least.”

After a moment of silence, Luo Qingyang prompted, ”…and Jiang Wanyin?”

”What about him?” Nie Huaisang asked innocently.

She raised a brow. ”What are your plans on Sect Leader Jiang?” And…wait a moment. Was that blush on Nie Huaisang’s cheeks? ”Wait, really?”

Nie Huaisang’s eyes darted away from hers. ”I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

”What?” Wei Wuxian said.

”Nothing—”

”He wants to romance Jiang Wanyin.” Luo Qingyang said.

Wei Wuxian burst into laughter. ”Jiang Cheng doesn’t have a romantic bone in his body!”

”That’s not the bone I’m interested in,” Nie Huaisang muttered behind his fan. A-Qing and Luo Qingyang choked and Wei Wuxian’s grin froze on his face. Lan Wangji looked the same as ever, no surprise there.

”Anyway,” A-Qing said, trying to wrangle back the control of the conversation. ”What did you mean by you having other plans for Nie Mingjue?”

”Da-ge is going to marry!”

A-Qing opened her mouth and then closed it before asking, carefully, ”Is Sect Leader Nie aware of his upcoming nuptials?”

”Oh, not yet. It’s still a bit of a work in progress. The scandal has to die down a bit first.”

Luo Qingyang sighed. ”I’m pretty sure I’ll regret asking this but what scandal?”

Nie Huaisang closed his fan with a sound that reminded of a whip and tapped the steel frame against his lips, carefully constructed in the perfect ring of a shocked ’O.’ ”Oh, right! You probably don’t know yet.” He leaned forward with a conspiring air. ”Jin Guangyao was caught in a, uh, compromising position, with his betrothed. It probably wouldn’t have been so bad as they were going to marry after all, but as it turned out, there was this small thing of young Maiden Qin’s parentage. It’s very tragic, absolutely horrible, and the whole cultivation world is buzzing with the news.” He paused for a dramatic moment and then stage-whispered, ”Qin Su is Jin Guangyao’s half-sister!”

For a moment, the kitchen was dead silent.

”What the actual fucking fuck,” Luo Qingyang said flatly.

Nie Huaisang shrugged. ”Apparently, Sect Leader Jin forced himself on Madam Qin years back. I assume that he probably trusted she’d never dare to reveal it but it seems that Madam Qin drew the line on incest.” He grinned and it was a sharp, ugly, and cold thing slashed across his face. ”Obviously the wedding is called off. Jin Guangyao’s reputation is in tatters even though it wasn’t really his fault—after all, he was with Maiden Qin when her mother broke her then news—and Jin Guangshan is…actually, no one knows where he is. I’m not sure anyone cares where he is. 

”Anyway. Sect Leader Qin is furious and Maiden Qin understandably devastated. They’ll need a moment before accepting my proposition. Qinghe is colder than the Lanling area but we also aren’t made of scheming asswipes and snakes so it should be a good place for Maiden Qin to recuperate. I’m pretty sure da-ge has never had a sexual thought in his life so, with her only competition being Baxia, it’s safe to say our new Madam Nie will have a fresh start.”

He let out a breath, downed his now-cold tea, and stood up. ”Oh my, all this traveling is truly exhausting. Is there a bed I could rest for a while?”

After he walked out, the rest of them sat in stunned silence until Lan Wangji said, bemused, ”I am not completely sure I understand what just happened.”

 


 

Nie Huaisang made himself scarce in the following days, dedicating most of his time to A-Yuan. It was a curious choice because the Young Master Nie that Luo Qingyang remembered wasn’t especially fond of children. He was scheming something but Luo Qingyang wasn’t sure what. So she decided to keep an eye on him.

The fact was, his proposition made sense—both of them: sworn brotherhood between Wei Wuxian and Nie Huaisang would stabilize their position and pretty much guarantee Qinghe Nie’s protection if things went from satisfactory to fucked up, and Nie Mingjue’s marriage with Qin Su would give them both something new to focus on.

Not for the first time, Luo Qingyang wondered just what kind of a man Nie Huaisang really was. He seemed soft and gullible on the outside but the flashes she’d so far seen told a completely different tale: he was a man who preferred leisure and beautiful things but who was—it seemed—also capable of cutting cruelty if needed. She was aware of his and Wei Wuxian’s friendship and if this was the length Nie Huaisang was willing to go for a friend, she shuddered at the thought of what he would be willing to do for his family.

She was going to make sure she never fucking needed to find out.

 


 

”—And then you’ll need to hold the brush like—ah, no, A-Yuan, let gege show—yes, that’s better…”

Nie Huaisang was sitting at the table outside the kitchen, teaching A-Yuan how to paint a fan. Luo Qingyang had no fucking clue of how he’d managed to carry a full set of paintbrushes, paints, and new fans but it told a lot about the quality of his qiankun pouches. And his priorities.

”Why do I feel like something is about to happen?” A-Qing murmured next to her.

”Oh, thank fuck, it’s not just me,” Luo Qingyang breathed. ”Yeah. This feels almost performative.”

A-Qing nodded. ”I wonder who’s the audience?”

I don’t think it’s us, Luo Qingyang was about to say when the wards around the Burial Mounds rang like a bell. And then again. And again. And— Look, it sounded a lot like someone with very little patience was banging on a door, getting ready to just knock the door down. A moment later, Wei Wuxian marched across the yard with Lan Wangji, Wen Ning trailing behind them with a mildly apologetic look on his face. 

Luo Qingyang shared a look with A-Qing. ”Well then,” she said dryly.

They stayed where they were, watching Nie Huaisang and A-Yuan. The rest of the Wen carried on with their chores but Luo Qingyang was familiar with the evacuation plans: if need be, the whole settlement would melt into the shadows of the Burial Mounds, leaving behind empty huts and abandoned dishes. She hoped there would be no need.

They heard the newcomers before they saw them, a voice bellowing Nie Huaisang’s name. The figure that followed the voice was just as imposing because it was Sect Leader Nie, followed closely by what Luo Qingyang only assumed was his second-in-command. 

Well. This was going to be interesting.

”HUAISANG!”

Nie Huaisang frowned and wrapped a protective arm around A-Yuan. ”Da-ge, quiet! You frighten the child!”

The look in Nie Mingjue’s eyes said what he thought of the reprimand but at least he lowered his voice. ”What the hell do you think you’re doing, Huaisang?”

”I’m teaching A-Yuan to paint, of course,” Nie Huaisang said like it was the most natural thing in the world. ”Why, is there something wrong with your eyes?” He lowered his brush and gave Nie Mingjue a concerned once-over. ”I left only a couple of days ago, has something happened?”

”Yes,” Nie Mingjue growled. ”My little brother went missing!” 

”Gege, is the angry man dangerous?” A-Yuan asked in a sweet voice that probably managed to fool those who weren’t yet familiar with A-Yuan.

”Oh no, A-Yuan, he’s not,” Nie Huaisang soothed. ”He’s my da-ge and he gets all shouty and growly when he’s worried.”

”Oh,” A-Yuan said carefully. ”Like when I followed the bugs and then Aunt Qing was mad and Xian-gege cried and Wangji-gege got all silent?”

Wow. Laying it a bit thick there, Nie Huaisang? Luo Qingyang didn’t dare to look at A-Qing to keep herself from giving into slightly hysteric laughter.

”Yes, exactly like that,” Nie Huaisang agreed solemnly. ”See, da-ge is my only family and I’m his only family. Just like you, we’ve lost our mama and baba.”

”Huaisang…” Nie Mingjue growled, but instead of angry, this sounded exasperated.

Nie Huaisang rolled his eyes. ”Well, don’t just stand there, da-ge! Get over here.” He waited until Nie Mingjue got over his slight hesitation and then stomped to the table and sat down. Luckily, the bench was sturdy and creaked only a bit under his weight. From the corner of her eye, Luo Qingyang saw Lan Wangji holding Wei Wuxian back by his wrist and Wen Qionglin calmly making his way closer to the table, making sure to keep himself in Sect Leader Nie’s field of vision.

”Look what we’ve been painting, da-ge!” Nie Huaisang said, nudging A-Yuan a bit.

”Look, da-ge,” A-Yuan parroted, holding out his painting with wide eyes.

Luo Qingyang saw the moment Nie Mingjue folded. His scowl melted away as he carefully accepted the crumpled paper from A-Yuan and when A-Yuan gave him his widest smile, all he could do was blink and duck his head. Fucking hell. Who would’ve thought Sect Leader Nie had a soft spot for kids? And that Nie Huaisang would be that efficient in transforming A-Yuan from a giggling menace into a lethal weapon?

Next to Luo Qingyang, A-Qing was biting her lip as she stared at the scene in front of them with a burning intensity. She recognized their chance just like Luo Qingyang did.

They were jolted from their thoughts when Granny made her way to the table and placed tea and a small bowl of boiled radish in front of Nie Mingjue. When he stared at the bowl and then at her, Granny huffed. ”No need to give me that face, young man. We lead a meager life but it doesn’t mean we don’t know hospitality. Eat up while it’s hot.” 

The whole settlement held its breath as Nie Mingjue stared at the plate. He opened his mouth and then closed it, and kept staring. What the fuck was he waiting for? Did he think the food was poison—ah. He probably did. Luo Qingyang swallowed down a frustrated groan.

And then A-Yuan frowned and reached out to snag a piece of radish and stuffed it into his mouth in front of Nie MIngjue’s alarmed eyes. ” ’s good,” he mumbled and then slapped his hands on his mouth. ”No talking while eating!” He said in a muffled voice, still munching his boiled radish.

For a moment, Nie Mingjue just stared. Then he guffawed before letting out a full-belly laugh. ”Godsdamned Lan rules,” he chortled. ”You’ve been spending too much time with your Wangji-gege.”

Nie Huaisang hummed. ”One can never spend too much time with one’s parents,” he said.

Sect Leader Nie downed his tea in one big gulp and set his cup on the table with a considering air. ”Huaisang. You are going to start from the beginning and you are going to explain everything.” He quirked a brow and added, ”Use small words to make sure I really, really understand.”

Nie Huaisang grinned like a cat.

 


 

Perhaps it was Nie Huaisang’s calculated brilliance that did it. Or perhaps it was A-Yuan’s wide eyes and the way he climbed on Nie Mingjue’s lap. Or perhaps it was the way Granny scolded him and called him ”young man,” or how Uncle Four offered him a cup of his fruit wine and then cackled madly when Nie Mingjue coughed so hard he nearly fell from the bench. Or perhaps it was the way his eyes took in the settlement, or the moment when he ”accidentally” walked in on Wei Wuxian anxiously wringing his hands because what if this was a plot and the sects were out to kill them all and he wasn’t strong enough to protect them and he just wanted to be left in peace—and then Lan Wangji kissed him to stop his spiraling. Luo Qingyang was never going to find out how Nie Huaisang arranged that scene but she was so fucking glad he was on their side.

In the end, Nie Mingjue proclaimed he’d support both Wei Wuxian and Nie Huaisang’s sworn brotherhood and Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji’s marriage. That made Wei Wuxian sputter because he hadn’t known that was even on the table, what the fuck Huaisang, but he was ignored by everyone else but Lan Wangji who turned his sorrowful (cue: slightly widened) eyes on and asked if his Wei Ying didn’t want to get married after all? That in turn got Wei Wuxian all panicky and teary-eyed and he apologized profusely and, well. The meeting sort of devolved from there.

When it was time for the Nie delegation to depart, Nie Mingjue reminded them how important it was to not draw any unnecessary attention to themselves. ”This is a delicate business,” he scowled. ”Let us handle it. We’ll get in touch with you when it’s time to arrange the ceremony.” His scowl deepened. ”Hopefully it’ll turn out better than the previous one.”

A-Yuan let out a worried sound and petted Nie Mingjue’s head. ”Don’t be angry, da-ge. A-Yuan will be good.”

”I know that, little one,” Nie Mingjue said. ”It’s not you I’m worried about.”

As he walked to Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji to transfer a surprisingly clingy A-Yuan into their arms, Luo Qingyang made her way to Nie Huaisang. ”So,” she said conversationally. ”Did it play out as you planned?”

Nie Huaisang fanned himself lazily. ”I have to admit I didn’t think A-Yuan would be quite that effective,” he murmured. 

She shook her head slowly. ”You are a strange, dangerous man, Young Master Nie,” she said and bowed. ”And I’m so fucking glad you’re our friend.”

Nie Huaisang shrugged, hiding his smile behind his fan.

Luo Qingyang made sure not to look over Nie Huaisang’s shoulder at the approaching figure. ”I wish you all the luck with your plan on seducing Sect Leader Jiang.”

The fan froze. ”I don’t—”

”Your plan to do what?” Nie Mingjue said slowly from behind him. ”Huaisang?”

Luo Qingyang winked at the visibly flustered Nie Huaisang and sauntered over to her family. 

Indeed, things were looking up.

Afterword

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